AFTER WEEKS OF HOLDING IT IN, THE BROWN EYE EXPLODES WITH 63.5 POINTS. LA MAQUINA’S POORLY PLACED POWER WEEK EXPOSES HIS GAMBLING PROBLEM.

Week 8 was the highest scoring week this year with an average just over 25.5 points. That was in large part in due to perfect weeks by BROWN EYE, HAMMES and MAMACITA. But it’s also been consistent play from new NORTH leader FLUNO and THE HOLY TRINITY that have scores skyrocketing. The last two weeks FLUNO has gone 6 for 7 in regular games while averaging 42 points. THE HOLY TRINITY is 7 for 9 with an average 34 points during that same span.

In the Pig EAST, CFGL shit-stain, BROWN EYE, squeezes into the top position as lackluster play continues to kill the conference. Most notably, LA MAQUINA squandered a two 10-point game opportunity for his Power Week. Clearly two 10-point games don’t satisfy the kind of action he needs to feel alive. If you're feeling pressure and consumption of gambling addiction, please email your Commissioner immediately.

On the cold side, G.O.W. has just 14 points since his 58 pointer two weeks ago. MORMON WHORES is also in bad shape as inter-team conflict has them at the bottom of the NORTH and #35 overall. CORKY MCBUTTS relies on a sentimental Colorado pick to pull her through her woes. Needless to say she’s still in the weeds. HOLLYWOOD is back on the very bottom and averages just over 12 points per week.

To help with scoring this week, you’ll notice that yellow type in a victory denotes a 10 pt Power game. FLUNO and THE HOLY TRINITY failed to qualify for the 20 pt Perfect Week bonus because they stacked Iowa and won only 4 games, and not 5.

Love,

The Commissioner